Happy Birthday Madeline
Please take a moment to stop by Madeline’s parent’s sites to offer them love on Madeline’s second birthday.
In honor of such a sweet and special girl, please consider making a donation to Friends of Maddie to help provide family support packs to nursing staff of Level III Neonatal Intensive Care Units across the United States. These support packs will be distributed to families of children admitted to NICUs for long term care, in Madeline’s honor.
Happy Birthday Maddie Moo!
Cartier Delices Refillable Purse Spray
This supremely feminine fragrance is a timeless blend of distinctive fruits like iced cherry and zesty bergamot blended with the spice of pink pepper and feminine floral notes like violet, jasmine, and freesia, finished with warm amber, musk, and sandalwood.
Notes:
Iced Cherry, Bergamot, Pink Pepper, Violet, Jasmine, Freesia, Amber, Tonka Bean, Musk, Sandalwood.
Style:
Luminous. Playful. Delightful.
Retail: $55
First Bid Wins, for only $39!
Ready, Set, GO!
*Sadly, this lot is only open to US Residents. Sorry, Canada*
*Winner pays shipping. See the Auction Information for details*
March for Maddie in LA: Heather’s Speech
This is the text of the speech I gave before the March For Babies in Los Angeles, CA.
My husband and I are honored to stand here. We speak to you today as happy parents of a NICU preemie who went home, and grieving parents whose baby was taken too soon.
Nothing about my pregnancy with our Daughter Madeline was easy or routine – blood clots, tumors, gestational diabetes were just the tip of the iceberg – but things really took a turn when I suffered from Preterm Premature Rupture of the Membranes at 19 weeks gestation. Unlike most women whose water breaks early, I didn’t immediately go into labor. My low amniotic fluid was managed with complete home and hospital bed rest. While I laid there on my left side, the March of Dimes website was our lifeline. Because of MarchOfDimes.com, we knew the terms doctors used, what questions to ask, and felt much more in control in what was an otherwise wildly out of our control situation.
Bedrest only managed my low amniotic fluid for so long, and after ten weeks of being on my side I had an emergency C-Section. The Doctors warned us that, despite two steroid shots to boost her lung development, our baby most likely wouldn’t cry. They were wrong. Our Madeline came out pink and crying, and it was the best sound I’d ever heard.
Our happiness was short-lived, however, when a Neonatologist came in to see us. Madeline was born at twenty eight weeks gestation, but because of my low amniotic fluid her lungs were more like those of a twenty-five weeker. She was sicker than the hospital could treat, and she needed to be transferred to UCLA in Westwood. We were so crushed. We knew she’d be in the NICU for a while but never anticipated she’d have to be at a different hospital than me.
Things were so very dire at first. My husband Mike stayed with Maddie at UCLA, while I recovered from my C Section down the road. Mike was told several times that Maddie wasn’t going to make it, and he had to call me each time to give me the news. I couldn’t stand being so far from my daughter and husband when they needed me, so I checked out of the hospital the day after she was born. I didn’t think twice about it, and I know there are so many other mothers out here who have done or would do the same if they had to.
I’ll never forget walking into the NICU for the first time. All the NOISE. The beeps of her pulse ox, the wheeze of her ventilator, the low humming of the medical staff. But the sight of my daughter with all the tubes and cords attached…It was my first real look at her. Even with everything attached to her, she was beautiful. It hurt to not be able to touch her. I didn’t get to hold her for two weeks.
In the first few days treatments pioneered by the March Of Dimes were completely responsible for Madeline’s survival. She was given surfactant so her lungs could inflate, and nitric oxide to help her blood absorb oxygen. Her NICU stay was the dreaded roller coaster we all are familiar with – infections, NEC, chest tubes. But we stood by her side, every second, minute, and hour, and we slowly watched her get better, and stronger. After 68 days, we brought our Maddie home. It was one of the happiest days of our lives.
Because her lungs were so premature, she required multiple breathing treatments per day, and often needed supplemental oxygen when she was sleeping. To Madeline, these were just minor inconveniences on her way to conquering the world. Her father and I felt blessed every day to have such a smart, loving, beautiful baby. We often would look at each other over her curly head and wonder how we got so lucky. Often, I would remember the day that my OB/GYN told me I would miscarry her. We never took our daughter for granted.
Despite our best efforts, Maddie got sick a lot. Her premature lungs were weak and she developed Chronic Lung Disease. She was hospitalized with pneumonia, bronchiolitis, and RSV. Even when sick, she handled herself with such happiness and grace. It seems so funny to say that about a toddler, but it’s true. She ALWAYS had a smile for every doctor or nurse or respiratory therapist. She never complained. She hardly ever cried. Her lungs never held her back. She wasn’t sickly at all – she was just a happy baby that, because of her weakened lungs, was hit harder by common colds.
It was so much fun to watch her grow. We celebrated every milestone – every month she grew older we’d sing happy birthday. By the time she reached seventeen months old, she was stringing together words, cruising around our home, and offering to share every toy she had. She was the kindest, most loving person I have ever known.
I wish I could say that things were different. But on April 6th, our Madeline developed a fast-acting lung infection, and her lungs, so weakened by prematurity, finally gave out. She passed away on April 7th, and our world has forever been changed. It would be easy for us to wallow in self pity, but we can’t. Maddie wouldn’t have wanted that. Instead, we are celebrating the seventeen wonderful months we had with her. Seventeen months that NO ONE expected us to have. Seventeen months that the March Of Dimes gave us. It is hard to be anything but grateful.
I have been struggling with what to say here to everyone for a week now. Our Madeline is no more special than anyone else’s child. Through happenstance, her passing has received a lot of attention, and my husband and I have searched to find a positive way to use the spotlight. It was natural for us to turn it toward the March of Dimes. We consider Maddie’s life to be a success story. She CAME HOME and she LIVED and she made us so, so happy. It is our hope that, through the funding the March of Dimes receives, other babies in Madeline’s situation won’t have the same ending. No parent should ever have to bury a child.
When you leave here today, I hope that you will close your eyes and picture a beautiful toddler with a gigantic grin. Remember that face, and remember the work the March of Dimes does. Carry that smile with you every day, and please continue to support the March of Dimes.
Video courtsey of A Southern Fairytale.
March for Maddie
Nom, Nom, NomThe list of walks (which are being maintained by Sarcastic Mom, so visit her site and see if there’s one in your area you can join!) has grown to 54! Fifty-four walks, all in Maddie’s name! I can’t begin to even wrap my mind around that. People all over the country are doing their part for the March of Dimes in honor of Madeline and it’s beyond heartwarming to see.
With these walks beginning shortly – if they haven’t already – it’s important that we save these moments for Heather and Mike since they’re not able to make it to every location.
I’m asking you to please take pictures while you’re out with your group so we can eventually include them here for Mike and Heather. There’s a Flickr group set up where you can join and add your photos of the walk(s) you participated in.
I’ve decided to make the Flickr group private so you have to ask to join to provide your images. I will check your statuses regularly so you’re not waiting too long to input any images you have to share!
If you’re not able to participate in a walk you’re still more than welcome to join the group to view pictures!
Maddie toesWays to Honor Maddie’s Memory
Edited to add: I briefly took this down because I felt I made the wrong decision. I don’t want to put this out there for people to do as a task. It’s meant to be a heartfelt gesture - something you want to do – not something to do because it was suggested. I didn’t want to take away from the impact of what this truly means to Heather and Mike.
I’ve reconsidered and posted it again because it truly is a wonderful way to pay it forward in Maddie’s memory. I never even considered doing something like this and I’m sure there are many others who have not either, and if it’s done sincerely it will make a huge impact.
:::
I know a ton of people are trying to figure out what they can do to help, to show support for Heather and Mike and to help honor Madeline’s memory. Being at a distance from them feels as though there’s nothing that can really be done accept financial support but that’s not the case (but it is always needed to help cover Maddie’s hospital care. So if you haven’t, please take a moment and donate to her PayPal fund! The button’s in the sidebar, just click that to be directed to the appropriate location).
If you are looking for a walk happening in your area, please check in with Sarcastic Mom. She has a growing list of walks happening across the country. Please check and see if one of the over 40 walks happening in Maddie’s honor are close to you!
Numerous people are hosting their own balloon launches for Operation Purple Balloon. Make sure to either video tape or photograph your launch so we have it to include on the site for Heather and Mike.
A number of on-line shop owners have begun to offer discounts and some of their proceeds to help support either the March of Dimes or the Spohr family directly. Check out their shops and know that if you purchase something you’re also helping out Madeline, Mike and Heather.
But the ULITIMATE gift? Visit a local NICU with Parent Survival Kits and food in hand just as Kristin and her best friend have. Before you go, make sure to read Heather’s post: Neonatal Intensive Care FAQ.
If you do have a chance to visit a NICU in your area, please let me know (marchformaddieATgmailDOTcom) and I will compile a list of those visits and any photographs of your preparation and delievery as well as posts you’ve written about them.
Anything you do in honor of Maddie’s memory, I want to know about it! Everything included on this site is a gift to Heather and Mike and I want to memorialize all your contributions for this truly wonderful family.
My Little Maddie Moo {Heather’s Speech}
Heather’s server is once again under a tremendous amount of strain from all the visits to her site. Thankfully, I grabbed a copy of her speech she read at Madeline’s service today. If you’re having trouble getting to her site, know that every single one of these comments will get to her as well.
Mike’s site is still running fine so please take a moment to stop by and read his touching tribute to his beautiful daughter and send him some love.
Sam xox
:::
I always wanted a daughter. When I was pregnant, I was unapologetic about this. Sure, I suppose I would have loved a boy, but I WANTED a girl. When I found out it was Madeline in my belly, I couldn’t hide my glee. Some people are afraid of girls and all the drama that can eventually surround them. I wasn’t.
My pregnancy and her birth and first few months were hard, as you all know. I prayed every day that the three strongest women I knew would watch over Maddie and give her the strength to pull through. These women, my Great Grandmother Mary, my Nana Nancy, and my grandmother Mary Alice, were the most AMAZING women you could know, and I was blessed to be related to them. I can only think that when Maddie passed they were waiting for Madeline in heaven, and are now teaching her all the things I never could.
Madeline wasn’t a normal child. She had a life that was filled with more struggle and pain than ANYONE should have to endure. But yet, you would never know it just by looking at her. She WASN’T sickly or weak. She was so incredibly strong. She was SO happy. I used to joke that someone needed to tell her about all the war and famine in the world because it wasn’t normal to be so happy. It was impossible to be upset around her. I was laid off in October, and while it stung, it was an easy thing to get over with Maddie around. I am so grateful I got to spend so much more time with her.
We did everything together. Grocery store, shopping, errands, the park. I called her my pocket side kick, because she was so little and portable. She was my partner in crime and my best buddy. She was almost embarrassingly beautiful. Everywhere we went, people would compliment her beauty – her eyes, her smile, her golden halo of curly hair. Every time someone told her she was beautiful, I would whisper in her ear, “you are more than just your looks. You are smart, you are kind, you are happy. Remember that.” I didn’t want her to get a big head. Her brains truly matched her beauty, and I’m not just saying that. It’s been independently verified by numerous developmental specialists.
All that being said, she DID like to look good. I could hold up two shirts in front of her, and she’d pick the prettiest, cheeriest outfit every time. One of my secret cheesy joys was dressing like her – and be certain, I was dressing like HER, not the other way around. She had more shoes than many adult women – seriously – and if she came across an errant shoe on the floor, she’d try to put it on her foot. She loved having her hair brushed, and had figured out how to comb her own mop of curls. I’d already braced myself for the shopping and pampering bills that were to come.
Perhaps one of my favorite things about Maddie was her sense of humor. She was becoming quite the accomplished mimic, but her sense of comic timing was already impeccable. She could make me laugh with just a glance or a movement of her shoulder. Her laugh was infectious and melodic, and the expressions she had were priceless. If it was quiet for too long, I could count on her to break the silence with a “hiiiii!” or a “woooooow” or by her favorite move, putting her fingers between her lips while making noise.
She loved everyone. She would go to anyone that wanted to hold her – and EVERYONE wanted to hold her – she even broke in some of the guys out here. Just last week, she learned how to say UP! She just loved to be held, kissed, hugged, loved. She love to GIVE kisses, hugs, and cuddles. She was so loving. A month or so ago we were on an errand to Target. With Maddie in my cart, we cruised that store in record time. As we walked by the toy section, I was overwhelmed with the desire to buy her a toy. I walked down an aisle and found a small Abby Cadabby doll (from Sesame Street). I held the doll up to Maddie and said, “Do you want this, baby?” She looked at the doll, looked at me, looked at the doll…and then the biggest smile broke out across her face. She looked at me again as if to say, “REALLY?” I said, “Take her, babe!” And she grabbed the Abby doll with both hands and started kissing it. She kissed that Abby doll every day.
She loved her dog Rigby especially. While Rigby would sometimes eye Maddie with mild suspicion (unless Maddie was eating – then Rigby was ALL ABOUT her), I was constantly amazed by her tolerance of Maddie’s “love.” Maddie had a hard time realizing that fur tugs, eye pokes, and tail pulls weren’t welcome signs of affection. But yet, Rigby never snapped at her. The last night Maddie was home, Rigby snuggled up right next to her in bed and Maddie ate it up. I am so happy Maddie had that moment with the puppy she adored.
I have a lot of things I’m sad I’ll never teach her, milestones I’ll never see her hit. The first day of kindergarten, high school, college at USC, of course. She was GOING to be a Delta Gamma like me and her Auntie Monica, and all of her other aunties in spirit. I’d say I’m sad she never went on her first date but she had so many boyfriends already. She’ll never hold a baby brother or sister, lose a tooth, be cheerleading captain and the star of the softball team. But I am lucky. I don’t have many regrets from when she was with me. I wish we’d taken her to Disneyland instead of crummy California Adventure. I wish I hadn’t kept her away from Elmo for so long, that crazy red puppet. I wish I’d taken her to the MAC makeup counter and said, “I want THAT lip color in a longwear lip glass.” But that? Is all I regret. I am so lucky.
I’ve always felt like I was a better talker than writer. When someone tells me I am a good writer I always think, “Mike is the writer, I am the talker.” But I’m having a hard time talking. I’m having a hard time writing. I’m having a hard time being. My blog started as a way to keep my family and friends informed about my pregnancy and Maddie’s NICU stay. After that, I wrote so Maddie would have a record of her life. So that someday, when she went through the awkward and unjust parts of growing up, I could say to her, “Honey, you are so tough, this is nothing compared to what you’ve already faced.” And now… Well… WE have a record of her life. If she ever has a sibling, we will be able to say “THIS is your sister.”
Through Madeline, I saw the world, and the world saw HER. She made me who I am and has given me experiences I never even dreamed of. I’ve always known my daughter is special, I knew she’d be famous and make an impact on the world. You don’t survive a hellish introduction into life for nothing, you know. And I never, EVER imagined that her passing would be how she made her mark. But I realize…her passing ISN’T how she made her mark. It was her LIFE. Her life is what touched all of you, and made you love the little girl with the big blue eyes and the gigantic grin. It is her LIFE that I hope you will all remember when you leave here today, and it is her LIFE that we should celebrate and never, ever forget.
My sun eyed girl. Little Maddie Moo. You were all we ever needed. It is an honor to be your mommy. You brought out the best in me, and made me a Mom. I am so, so lucky to have had you in my arms and in my life. I love you with all of my being.
You will always be the daughter I always wanted.
The Tribute to Our Madeline from Mike and Heather on Vimeo.
Maddie, Remembered
It’s been a difficult couple of days, trying to see the light through the clouds of sadness.
I’ve found myself thinking of Maddie very often, hoping that she’s in a better place. A better place without the oxygen rockets, breathing treatments and the nasal cannula, where she can run and play. A place where there is no RSV, hospital visits or pesky IV’s pricking her beautiful ivory skin, only candy, unicorns and the color purple.
I know she’s smiling and laughing.
Today, Maddie’s parents lay her to rest while family and friends provide them the much needed support to get through. Those of us who can’t be there in person are definitely there in spirit. We’re wearing our purple, releasing our balloons and shedding a tear enough tears to fill the oceans for sweet Madeline.
Heather and Mike’s dedications to their beautiful daughter Madeline can be seen at their respective sites – The Spohrs Are Multiplying as well as The Newborn Identity.
Please, go there (not all at once, we don’t want servers crashing again), comment and send them your love. Oh, and don’t forget to have a box of Kleenex at hand; you’re going to be needing it. I promise you that.
Also, depending on the stability of their hosting, while their sites in inundated with condolences, I also have a copy of each speech which I can make available should anything falter.
Mike and Heather’s tribute to Madeline:
The Tribute to Our Madeline from Mike and Heather on Vimeo.
On-line Shops Contributing Proceeds! and Bloggers host GIVEAWAYS! {UPDATED}
There are a bunch of sales happening this week at a few on-line shops which are contributing a portion of their proceeds to the Spohr family and the March of Dimes. Get your shopping on to help Little Maddie Moo’s family and her favourite charity!!
*** I will be adding more as they come in, so please check back often for HUGE deals and awesome giveaways all in Maddie’s honor!***
Now through the 17th of April, with the coupon code WECARE we’re donating 100% of the proceeds of all Honolulu Lulu Francie Pants (the only ones with purple in them) to the Spohr family, to cover their expenses and do with as they wish. 15% of all other sales made using this coupon code will also go to support the Spohr family.
Bellaziza is donating 100% of the proceeds of all of our purple barrettes and 50% of the proceeds of everything else to the Spohr Family, as a way to show them that we care and wish to stand beside them through this difficult time.
Use code “WECARE” to participate at checkout.
45% of all sales through April 15th go to Maddie Spohr’s parents for service costs.
In memory of Madeline Alice Spohr, Good for the Kids will be donating 100% of the proceeds from sales that use the promotional code MADDIE between now, and Wednesday, April 15.
Each bracelet designed by the girls of Room 704 is handmade, created with love and costs $20. Approximately 70% of the proceeds will be donated to Heather and Mike in Maddie’s memory.
Participating in a March for Maddie?Here’s a t-shirt for you! Join these ladies in supporting Maddie’s parents, Mike & Heather, by purchasing and wearing a purple t-shirt to honor Maddie & support March of Dimes.
The IvyLeague’s Bridget, the master behind the Maddie mosaic is offering personalized mosaics for limited time (until May 20th), with all proceeds going to Mike and Heather. Each mosaic will be a personalized photo mosaics for you!
100% of the purchase price from Manacing Pickle Designs (jewelry only) will go to Heather and Mike. Available until April 17th!
Princess Time Toys is offering 50% off the purchase price of items purchase before April 14th.
***Recently ADDED:
Bil Simers (my girl @PrincessJenn’s husband) has offered up something HUGE for us techie geeks. For every $10 you donate (at the PayPla link provided) your donation will get you a chance to win a MSDN Premium Subscription with Team Suite. The subscription is for 1 year from when you activate it and includes all Microsoft operating systems (for test and development) and copies of Team Suite and other great developer tool. The entire package is a great bundle for software developers and has a retail value of $10,939.00 USD.
Entries will be accepted up to 12:00 AM Sunday, April 19th. You have one week to get your donations in and get a chance to win this package.
To encourage donations from fellow Lost fans: if you donate money in ANY amount, sign up for a March of Dimes walk for Maddie or turn your Twitter or blog purple in her honor, leave a comment at JOpinionated with your name & email address. You will be entered to win one of the following from my personal collection*:
- 10 Lost t-shirts of various styles & sizes
- a Lost soundtrack CD
- one autographed Sterling Beaumon (young Ben Linus) t-shirt
- a John Locke action figure.
*note: giveaway open to US residents only but everyone is encouraged to donate.
Mamanista! is donating 10% of all of their site’s income, for the month of April in Maddie’s memory, so get over there and buy something!
Nap Mats and More as well as Sassy Monsters are offering a 5% discount to people using the discount code Maddie10 as well as 5% of the sale is going back to March of Dimes in honor of Maddie.
*** GIVEAWAYS ***
For every $10 you donate to help the Spohrs, you will get one entry for the Nintendo DS. Donate $20, get two entries. Donate $15, get one entry (in other words, cough up that extra $5).
Click here to enter and support the Spohrs! Giveaway ends Friday, April 17.
Y is giving away a Nikon Coolpix 10 mega pixel digital camera! To enter, all you need to do is make a donation of at least $10. For every $10 you donate, you’ll get an extra chance to win. (Example: If you donate $30, you’ll be entered 3 times. If you donate $25, you’ll be entered twice.)
Project Purple Balloon
Make sure you have Kleenex for this one.
I’m not kidding.
Great work GeminiGirl!!
